Grief and the holidays

Christmas conjures up so many memories of years past. It is impossible to move through the season without focusing on those who are no longer with us on this earth. So many have lost someone. Many have empty seats at their holiday tables. Wherever you go, people shout “Merry Christmas!” “Happy Holidays!” For those missing someone, these words emphasize the gaping loss in our lives. I’ve learned if I allow myself to step back and breathe, I can absorb the feelings of peace and good will that go with the greetings without feeling sucker punched by the words. Merry and happy are in direct conflict with the feelings grief evokes, but peace and good will help ease the ache of grief. If we make t

4 years...4 years...4 years...4 years

Today marks 4 years since T.J. left this earth. Today marks 4 years since T.J. died by suicide. His death has left a void so vast there are no words to describe it. That saying, “time heals all wounds,” just isn’t true. The gaping wound of loss that rips open your soul never heals—but thankfully it doesn’t stay as raw. There is always a question of what to do on this day that can’t be avoided, but is one I don’t want to remember or mark. Today is the anniversary of the worst day of my life, but instead of focusing on the horror of the day, I will reflect on the beauty of my boy who was a bright spark in this world. T.J. was a gorgeous baby with a full head of hair, bright, intelligent eyes


© 2018 Remembering T.J.